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The Passion of the Cruise

Sally Lybrand
Commentary Editor
Photo courtesy of http://www.tomcruisefan.com/

   Couch jumping on “Oprah,” telling Matt Lauer he is “glib,” condemning Brooke Shields for treating her post-partum depression with antidepressants, and being dismissed from Paramount Pictures for erratic behavior are the most notable current achievements for Tom Cruise. Add to that list being the “chosen one of Scientology.” 

   David Miscavige, a prominent leader in the whacked-out pseudo religion Scientology recently dubbed Cruise as the “Christ” of Scientology. A source with ties to Cruise said, "Tom has been told he is Scientology's Christ-like figure. Like Christ, he's been criticised for his views. But future generations will realise he was right." He was right about what?  He was right in that donating millions of dollars to, essentially, a cult will give you peace and make you a good person? 

   Oh, and about that criticism thing: Jesus was not just criticized for unpopular teachings.  He was crucified. There are no comparisons between Cruise and Christ and anyone who seriously makes that comparison is, well, glib.

   Do you want to know what is glib beyond all comprehension? Tom evangelizes for Scientology! He is “spreading the gospel” and attempting to convert the “raw meat,” as Scientologists like to refer to those of us who aren’t following Hubbard’s rules and regulations. Can you just picture it? Tom’s likeness on a poster surrounded by spaceships and little green people with the slogan, “Tom Cruise: actor, humanitarian, evangelist.”

   I guess starring in “War of the Worlds” was doing the Lord’s work in his mind. 

   Apparently Katie Holmes converted to Scientology much to her Catholic family’s chagrin. If you’re married to the messiah, shouldn’t you believe the same stuff? Do they have a warning about being unequally yoked to non-Scientologists? I suppose now she is the Mary Magdalene of Scientology. That is, if you buy into the whole “Da Vinci Code” ridiculousness. 

   Seriously, I feel sorry for Katie. I am thinking about buying one of those “Free Katie” shirts to help fund her capture and release campaign. Does Tom preach at her during dinner? Is she even allowed to eat? If only Suri weren’t so darn cute.

   Ponder a 1949 quote from Hubbard for a moment. "I’d like to start a religion. That’s where the money is." Correct me if I am wrong, but doesn’t Tom Cruise practically have all the money in the world? Obviously he is not in this for financial gain; he is in it because he really believes that Scientology, again a man made pseudo religion asserting that humans are oppressed by alien forces, will save his soul.

   Tom’s rank as a Scientologist is OT-6 (operating thetan), three levels above those who receive the knowledge of the secrets of Scientology. I am expecting him to do the Vulcan thing and say “live long and prosper.” Members must pay significant amounts of money to receive revelation and move up to the next level of understanding. That explains why everyone makes such a big deal about him. He is the only one who can afford to be such a good little alien chaser.

   I tried to do Internet research about Scientology and I must admit that I am more confused about it now than I was when I began. The fact that L. Ron Hubbard, a science fiction writer, for crying out loud, invented a religion is enough to upset my stomach.  During my research, albeit shallow research, I found a nice little Web site called Operation Clambake. Clambake examines contradictions of the sect, information about beliefs, and even a “Baloney Detection Kit.” Hey, you have to know your enemy to fight against it.

   The fact remains that no matter what, people will worship anything. These days, however, people don’t make golden calves and Baal statues; they look to the likes of Tom Cruise for all the answers. I am afraid to admit that even a rock probably has more sense than the guy formerly known as Maverick.

http://www.xenu.net/

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ŠThe Voice 2007
Revised
10/24/2007 02:58:37 PM — http://www.uamont.edu/Organizations/TheVoice/4_14/commentary.htm